You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
