found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Randomize
