i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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