We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Go christen that room with your naked body.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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