she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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