your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog