Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Randomize
