So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
that may or may not have been my penis.
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