I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
