Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
