Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
