She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Randomize
