Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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