Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
grandma shit on top of the toilet
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
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