god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
and you fell through a lawn chair
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
