No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
We are all done wearing pants today
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
