Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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