So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Randomize
