i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
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