"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
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