so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
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He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
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