Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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