Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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