I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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