did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
they need to just BURY HIM!
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
