CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
