At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
