you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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