Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Randomize
