not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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