Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Randomize
