He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
i will never coherently bang her
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize