Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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