I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Randomize
