At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
