Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
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