Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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