Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Success! We fucked roommates!
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
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