make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
