Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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