i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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