nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
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