I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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