Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Randomize