Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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