I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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