Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize