who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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