butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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