I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Randomize
