he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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